Archive for Vampires
Vampires by J.R. Rain, H.T. Night, Aiden James and P.J. Day
If you have been checking out some of the new authors in the world of vampire fiction, you have probably seen or read these guys. They are all part of the new crowd of modern vampire stories that places the princes of the night in a whole new light (so to speak). I love that with this book you get introduced to four vampire series that have all taken off in interesting new directions.
Moon Dance by J.R. Rain – This introduces us to Samantha Moon, a soccer mom turned vampire. The series has been covered elsewhere but I will tell you that Rain has become a bit of a darling of the vampire writing set. The story takes the concept of vampires into the world of the private detective. Very fun stuff indeed.
Vampire Love Story by H.T. Night – I find that Night’s stories have an almost super-hero sensibility to them. Or you might say it is simply mythic. Here we meet Josiah, the classic reluctant hero. There are echoes of old Greek mythology in this, and some classic bard tales too. Again- a different approach but it sits well with the other author’s stories here.
The Vampires Last Lover by Aiden James – College freshman Txema has it all – cute, energetic and smart enough to get into the University of Tennessee. But the discovery that she has “special blood” puts her in contact with a “lost tribe” of vampires. There is a mix of the old “lost tribe” fantasy and science fiction from the 40s and the sensual vampire tales of the 20s to get a very heady and fun mixture. The series is sufficiently different from the run of the mill – kinda Sookie in another direction.
Kings Blood– A Vampire Revealed by P.J. Day – A tech businessman who is a vampire. This is such a refreshing change for a vampire story, you will be glad you got a taste of it here. I can well imagine that P.J. Day had a hard time pitching this idea, but it really works here. After getting through the last 100 years, vampire Jack King feels he is ready to take on anything. But our modern world can strip your mask off faster than you think. Can a vampire survive the era of the internet? To top it all off, discoveries about his blood, and its value to others, make Jack’s life more adventurous then he needs right now. Great modern take on what a vampire needs to survive in today’s world.
So there you have it. This book gives you a chance to sample four great new vampire series by checking out all of the initial introductions of the characters in one book. It’s smart marketing on their part –smart buying on yours.
Are Vampires for Real?
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I know this is going to sound really strange to many of you, but I do get this question now and again because of the work I do reviewing vampire books both here and elsewhere. Every now and then I get a reader asking me if vampires are real.
Now vampire bats are real, and the idea of a living dead creature we now call a vampire has been around for quite some time. Does that mean that there are real honest-to-goodness vampires walking around the earth? My initial answer, of course, is no. But then there are some interpretations of what exactly a vampire is.
A Site for Vampires to “Come Out”
That was when I got curious and discovered this site for “real vampires”. It tries to explain that there are vampires, and even gives some more or less scientific explanations for why they do exist even if we can’t prove it. I wouldn’t have spent two minutes on it if it weren’t for my curiosity in how much information they had gathered on this site.
They even list clubs that meet in various cities to party down, vampire style. Now, to my mind these are simply “goth clubs” and I know they have been around for a while. It is probably fun to go to one, dressed all in goth rags and pretend you are a vampire for the night. I have actually been to one for fun, and they are very atmospheric. But does anyone who go really think they are a vampire? I don’t buy it.
But heck, check them out. The site lists quite a few clubs, talks about how to “come out” as a vampire and why you should, and even has a letter from “a real slayer”. Now, until Buffy I had not even heard much about slayers, but now I guess they are just part of the lore.
So if you are at all curious about vampires, think you might be one, or want to hang out with vampires or people who think they are or want to be vampires, this here site is just the ticket! It just goes to prove that there is a place for everyone on the web – even vampires.
True Blood, Season 5, Ep 12: Save Yourself
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Everybody in the fairy club blasts Russell with their power of light but he just keeps coming…and not in a good way. He simply laughs at their attempts to stop him. That’s when Eric zooms in and hauls Russell away from the fairy club. Simultaneously, Russell starts to decompose with fairly light shining through cracks in his skin and he proceeds to explode in true vampire death fashion.
Bill waits for his breakfast and Sam is marched in naked. Bill berates the guards for bringing him a shifter. Sam tries to speak to Bill and convince him to save Emma but Bill only wants to protect his vampire kingdom. So Sam shifts into a fly and Bill chases him around the room at vampire speed but Sam escapes.
Eric and Nora enter Fangtasia with Nora lamenting that she cannot believe she’s lived so long and never met a fairy. As they enter the bar, Tara comes out and says “they got Pam”. Eric pulls cash from his hidey-hole in the wall and as he tells Nora that they are all family – Eric, Nora, Pam and Tara.
Sookie wants to take Jason to the hospital because he’s so spaced out but she does not realize that he is seeing their parents, they are talking to him and Sookie is completely oblivious to the fact that her parents are sitting in the room. Eric, Nora and Tara race into her house at vampire speed – it’s the first time Sookie has seen Tara since she was initially turned into a vampire and it’s not a joyful reunion.
Eric informs Sookie that it was Bill behind the bombing of the Tru Blood factories. They’ve got to get him out of the vampire underground before he loses himself completely. Jason is totally against this but he agrees to go along when his father (who no one else can see) urges him to go because he can potentially kill lots of vampires.
Martha drives to Alcide’s father’s house with a “V” drunk Rikki, the girl who told Alcide she would be his second if he wanted to fight to be the pack leader. Martha is scared she has overdosed so Alcide throws her over his shoulder and takes her into his dad’s trailer. Ahh, so romantic….
Lafayette makes cajun margaritas for Holly and Arlene and they are having a good time a Merlotte’s until Andy arrives with his favorite fairy one-night stand. As Maurella throws back salt like there is no tomorrow, Andy confesses to Holly that he has had sex twice outside their relationship. That’s when the fairy starts to have her baby.
Bill’s in bed with Salome, calling her his beautiful prophet. Then he jumps on her and starts humping away…have these vampires never heard of foreplay? Steve Newlin shows up to take his pet Emma out, urging her not to shift into human form. He’s very nervous and he wants to just get out of there with his little dog.
Holly gamely acts as midwife for Andy’s pregnant fairy and a very large, clean baby is born with no umbilical cord or nasty bloody mess. That’s when the fairy girl starts screaming again and Holly says “we’re not done”. Four girls in and all…Maurella steps in and says Andy must take care of t hem. She leaves, saying Andy is responsible for getting at least two of them into adulthood. That will teach him to make bargains with fairies.
Alcide and his father are ready to take on JD after imbibing some ultra powerful V. Alcide proceeds to beat JD, he breaks is neck and it’s over. Alcide is the new packmaster and they all bow before him. He tells the pack they had better start respecting themselves or they can leave.
Steve is forced to go onto live TV to try and defend a viral video which shows him and Russell entering a frat house where all the humans were later found dead. As Steve reads the teleprompter, he starts to get sick and throws up blood. The vampire councillor is not amused. Suddenly Steve transforms into Luna and she tells the nation that the vampires are keeping humans in an underground bunker, feeding on them. Sam flies into the vampire councilor’s mouth, shifts back to human while he’s inside her, instantly vaporizing the woman. Luna falls to the side and faints.
Eric brings Sookie, Tara, and Jason to the vampire lair as pretend prisoners in order to gain entry. They infiltrate the lair and kill every vampire they encounter. Finding Pam and Jessica, Sookie and Tara release them and when Tara gets Pam out of her cell, they start passionately kissing. Jessica says “I knew it!”
Salome lets Bill know that she is the chosen one – not him. She plans to drink all of Lilith’s blood, turning the vessel up and drinking it all down. Bill looks a little to self satisfied when she does this. What’s his evil plan? We find out when Salome starts to violently throw up blood and Bill tells her he put silver in the blood.
Bill is in full madman mode when Eric and Sookie burst into the room. Eric tells him that Lilith is a mad god, wanting only destruction. Sookie tries to talk to Bill but he cruelly shuts her down – did she really think he did anything out of “feelings” for her? He tells her that she is an abomination just like the vampire bible says. He tosses back the real blood of Lilith and then starts to bleed from all his orifices until he explodes into a puddle of blood. Sookie and Eric are shocked. But, that’s not the end of Bill as he slowly emerges up from the puddle of blood, hissing at them. Season 5 ends with Eric screaming “RUN” as they try to escape this new horror that stands in front of them.
True Blood, Season 5, Ep 11: Sunset
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Down in the vampire’s underground lair, Bill hears a voice calling his name and that’s when the doors to the shrine holding Lilith’s blood mysteriously slide open. Lilith herself appears and she says she chooses Bill as her leader. He thinks it’s just a hallucination until he spies Lilith’s bloody handprints still visible on the shrine. Perhaps she is the real deal.
Jessica tries to use Bill’s phone to warn Jason and Sookie about Russel’s impending rampage. Bill stops her and says no contact but Jessica is willing to make Jason a vampire in the ‘image’ of Lilith if Bill will let her go. He takes her up on her offer, telling his people to take Jessica to Bon Temps to make Jason into a vampire. That’s not quite what Jessica had in mind and her plan to escape is thwarted.
Eric paces in his room/cell when Nora appears and they clutch each other in obvious desperation. Then, off comes the clothes as their kissing becomes more frantic and they are having hot sex on the bed while she begs his forgiveness for her earlier perfidy.
Sookie is freaking out over the fact that she was sold to a vampire 300 years ago by her ancestor and Jason wants to help her in any way he can. Mirella, Andy’s pregnant one-night stand, sends them to an elder of the fairy legion to try and figure out what is happening with the vampire Warlow.
The government makes its way into the vampire lair when a general wants to know where the Guardian, Roman, is. He says the US government and the Vampire Authority have an arrangement for mainstreaming and Roman was the only one keeping the vampires from sliding back into the dark ages. It’s about to get ugly.
Bill tells the general that he had better tow the line of the new regime but the human general has played the political game before…he shows them a flash drive with pictures of Russell and Steve killing 21 frat boys. The general reminds them that they assured the world and the president that Russell Edgington was dead and it’s obvious that they lied. The general says there is only one person standing between them and all out war – it’s him – and he arrogantly starts to walks away. That’s when Eric zips up and breaks his neck.
Salome is totally pissed that Eric killed the general. Both Eric and Nora ask to be released from the vampire lair so they can go and wipe everyone’s minds of the frat killing video. They are almost out the door when Bill stops them, insisting they take a security detail. What an annoying zealot he has turned out to be.
Jason drives home from the fairy bar to find Jessica sitting outside his home with her two “supervisors”. She’s tries to give him clues about her keepers when they force her hand and she has to bite Jason – creating her first progeny. Jessica and Jason are buried in the dirt in fine vampire style with Jessica crying about how sorry she is for what she did to him. Suddenly she says, “do it” and Jason sits up firing at the two security vampires. Looks like Jessica and Jason win this round. Apparently he had wooden bullets because the two security vamps explode. She tells him that if she had to spend eternity with someone, it would be Jason.
Sookie is being taken to meet the fairy elder who might know her ancestor John Stackhouse and why he promised Sookie to a vampire named Warlow. The elder says it is her destiny to be entwined with Warlow because a dark time is coming – Sookie must hold onto her light as long as she can and they will be free. Sookie is frustrated at the lack of specificity.
Mirella shows up at Merlotte’ to inform Andy that he has to protect her and her coming baby. He can’t comprehend it, they had sex a week ago and now she looks 9 months pregnant. Andy wants to keep the good thing he’s got going with Holly but Mirella tells him that if he disavows her, it’s an act of war.
Sam and Luna find Emma in a row of cages with other naked shapeshifters. They are captured by the vampire guards and Sam volunteers to be Bill’s next meal, leaving Luna behind to save her daughter.
Jessica meets Bill in his chamber and he accuses her of choosing humans over vampires. She mouths off to him which prompts him to hit her – sending her flying across the room and yelling at her “Lilith Chose Me!” Can you say megalomaniac?
Jason stands guard on Sookie’s porch when Russell races up at vampire speed and takes the weapon from his hands. Russell and Steve glamour Jason into taking them to the fairy clan. Jason shows up at the fairy club, telling them that Russell is coming for the fairies and the elder is shocked that Russell Edgington is alive. Sookie tells the fairies that they must band together and kill Russell and the fairy tribe of BonTemps tells her they will fight with Sookie Stackhouse.
The elder throws fairy blasts of killing light at Russell but he is able to get behind her and proceeds to drink her dry. That’s when he’s able to suddenly “see” the fairy club and all its inhabitants. And then, just as they realize he can see them, Russell runs to the fairies huddled in the doorway of the club. Will he really drink them all dry so quickly? That’s kind of stupid – this guy may have lived for 3,000 years but he’s one dumb vampire if he does that.
Disturbing times in the vampire world as the supplies of Tru-Blood begin to run out. Steve Newlin does his vampire spokesman thing, prompting Sookie to turn the TV off. There’s a knock at her door and she answers it with gun in hand. A fairy girl in a vampire world can’t be too careful these days. It’s Mike, the coroner, and he’s a newly turned vamp. He starts munching down on her but she stakes him with some chopsticks. Yet another good reason to eat take-out chinese food – as if we needed one.
The area five sheriff, Elijah, is reading the riot act to Pam and Tara about a new mandate to create baby vampires. If they don’t meet it, that’s it for Tara – Pam loses her progeny to the new sheriff. Pam informs Tara that she’ll let the bar go before she is forced to make new progeny.
Nora and Bill force Eric to accept Lilith’s blood and they start the latest hallucinogenic ride. Bill watches the two of them and even though Eric and Nora see Godric, Bill sees nothing in the room with them. Suddenly Lilith appears in all her naked beauty and she rips Godrics head off. Bill looks concerned as he watches the video feed – perhaps he is finally convinced that it is all just a drug-induced high?
Jessica comes into Merlotte’s to meet Hoyt who also arranged to meet Jason there as well. He tells them he is going to Alaska and he wants her to glamour him into forgetting both of them – Hoyt will have no memories of Jessica or Jason. It’s a very sad moment, he looks so very unhappy. That convinces her to do it and after he counts to ten, Hoyt has forgotten them both. Jason looks devastated.
Jason ends up at Sookie’s house where she laments her inability to figure out what her grandmother was trying to tell her about something under the bed. He looks under there and sees a false floor, saying “who’s the smart one now?” Opening a floorboard, they find a box with some type of manuscript in it. It’s written in characters that neither of them can understand. Taking it to a local university, the expert tells them the vellum is over 200 years old but it’s just random glyphs on a page – it’s not in any human language and Sookie and Jason exchange a significant look. Guess we know where they are headed next…
Sam and Luna are pulling out all the stops to try and get Emma back from Steve Newlin. Steve is on TV in a debate with a pro-human congressman who questions how the vampire is looking so rosy with Tru-Blood in such short supply. With his typical wily ways, Steve turns the question back onto the interrogator, calling him a conspiracy theorist. Meanwhile, Sam and Luna appear in Steve’s dressing room but Emma is not there.
Jessica wanders around Bill’s house, remembering her first moments with Hoyt. Suddenly, the house is broken into by a bunch of vampire security goons who tell her to come with them, she is being called by her maker. Bill shows Jessica around the vampire lair where he tells her about their new religion. She’s not impressed – she’s the product of a forced religious upbringing and that will ruin anyone’s appetite for a zealot’s appeal.
Eric is brought to the vampire cadre where he professes his belief in Lilith. He convinces them with his display of humility before Russell, even kissing his ring. It’s revolting to see Eric in this role.
Elijah shows up at Fangtasia, where Tara is in a panic thinking she killed Ginger when trying to turn her into a vampire. Elijah is disgusted as Tara rattles on – she says “I don’t know nothin’ about birthing no baby vampires”. But apparently, it was all a ploy because when Elijah approaches Ginger, she stabs him and Tara slices off his head. Pam speeds into the room, not believing what she is seeing. There is probably going to be some nasty fallout over this.
Steve returns to the vampire lair where Emma comes out looking for her mommy. He yells at her for leaving her dog form and chases her out of the room. In the background, you see two white mice run out of his briefcase – looks like Luna and Sam have found Emma.
Russell and Salome have a confrontation over harnessing fae blood and walking in the sun and that’s when the real Russell appears – throwing Salome against the wall and denouncing their religion, saying he will not be restrained by their god. He says that he will have the sun. Sookie better watch out.
Claude is trying to read Sookie’s mysterious document but it’s older than him. They get a very pregnant fairy (remember Andy’s dalliance in the field?) who’s older and she says it’s a contract between a Stackhouse from 1702 and Warlow, giving Warlow his first female descendent. And yes, you guessed it – that’s Sookie! I guess her pledge to be done with all vampires is going to be hard to keep now, isn’t it?
Lafayette is in Sookie’s bathroom trying to identify the creepy vampire spirit who says he’s coming to get her. Lafayette cannot make a connection to the undead but he still wants to get paid for his services. As they sit on Sookie’s bed chatting, Lafayette starts to feel something weird. He hears the voices of ghosts and speaks directly to Sookie’s grandmother. She tells Sookie that she is sleeping on top of the information she needs.
Salome’s plan to get rid of the vampire mainstreamers is in full force as the first of five True Blood factories burns to the ground. The Sanguanistas, including Eric and Bill, intensely watch the newscast and then they celebrate by feasting on a live human served up like a thanksgiving turkey.
Jessica is tired of telling the police over and over that Hoyt is not a vampire hater – he really loves her and he was not trying to hurt her. She can no longer feel his presence and she’s afraid he’s dead. That’s when we see an unconscious Hoyt being dragged across the ground toward a barn.
Luna is no longer turning into Sam and she’s feeling back in control. Even though she is weak, Luna insists on going with Sam to look for the men who shot them. Sam is annoyed at her stubbornness, he gets angry with her and then tells her he loves her. She grudgingly admits she loves him too. She still insists on going with him though.
Sookie and Lafayette are looking through the box of memorabilia that was under Sookie’s bed unable to ascertain what her grandmother was trying to tell her. Lafayette notices that Jason’s sixth grade teacher was Lynn Dearborn, the old sheriff’s wife. Sookie notices that Sheriff Dearborn was the one who discovered her parent’s bodies. Sookie decides that her grandmother wants her to talk to the Sheriff.
Sookie visits Bud Dearborn asking him if he noticed anything unusual about her parent’s death. He tells her that he saw the bite marks but did not know about vampires at the time so they assumed alligators had gotten to the body. She reads his mind as he talks and hears that he is hiding something from her. She grabs his hand to hear him more clearly and realizes he does not know anything after all. That’s when his girlfriend knocks her on the head with a frying pan.
Jason and Andy are looking for clues to the identities of the hate mongers when they realize that Sheriff Dearborn arrested two of them in the past. Reviewing the youtube video of a vampire death posted by the killers, Andy finally realizes that Bud is the dragon because of his distinctive boots. Sam and Luna hear it all as flies on the wall.
Sookie wakes up the sound of pigs squealing and realizes her hands are tied. Hoyt is tied up in the next stall, drugged and unconscious. Bud tries to explain to Sookie why he is doing this. His new girlfriend, Sweetie, arrives and tells him to just drug Sookie but he is not happy about it.
Sookie asks Sweetie why she has so much hate and reads her mind to find that Sweetie’s husband left her for a shifter. Bud tells Sookie that Sweetie is the Dragon and the love of his life as he pours the drug into her. Andy and Jason arrive at Bud’s house to arrest him but he is gone. Jason remembers that Bud’s wife’s family owned a pig farm.
Arlene is trying to open Merlotte’s when Patrick slips up holds a gun to her head. Patrick calls Terry, telling him to come to the bar with his hands up. Terry sees he has Arlene, he says they should fight it out but Patrick is not interested, he knows he will lose to Terry. Patrick is about to shoot Terry when Arlene stabs him in the neck with a pencil and she gets the gun. Now the tables have turned.
Terry is having real trouble killing Patrick until the ghost of the Iraqui woman he killed tells him to do what is right. He proceeds to shoot Patrick and she releases the Ifrit to take Patrick’s body. The curse is over.
The hate mongers are recording the impending deaths of Hoyt and Sookie as they invite the pigs in for their dinner. That’s when Sam, who has been hiding as a pig, changes back to fight them. Andy and Jason arrive just as the fight is getting good and Andy ends up having to shoot Bud. Sweetie is on the run but Luna catches her in no time and she gets some “sweet” revenge.
Russell is letting JD, the new pack leader, and his wolves drink from him when he sees Martha off to the side holding Emma in puppy form. When she refuses to drink his vampire blood, Russell takes Emma and gives her to Steve as a pet. The pack knows now that Russell is in charge.
Eric and Bill’s plan to escape the other vampires is going well – or so Eric thought until Bill betrays him at the last moment. Telling Eric it is all for his own good, the guards take him away. Bill and Salome exchange a knowing look, it appears they are the real deal.
The vampire party continues their blood-fueled frenzy down in the vaults of the Vampire Authority. Everyone is having the time of their life (or death) except for Eric who asks Bill what he saw at the club when they were draining everyone. Bill says they were in the presence of god and Eric looks at him unbelievably.
Sookie is still working to rid herself of fae magic by sending out blast after blast of light from her hands. Jason shows up and stops her, convincing her that she is special, her power is special and with that power, they will be able to find the vampire that killed their parents.
Last week, Sam took down one of the shifter snipers in the hospital and this week Sheriff Andy carts him off to jail. Luna is freaking out because there is no where she feels safe – the killers are everywhere. Sam is his typical understanding self as he tries to help her back to her hospital bed but she angrily pushes him away so he leaves to continue the hunt. When Sam is gone, Luna painfully shape-shifts into him and ends up sneaking out of the hospital – looking so cute with his butt hanging out of the gown, prancing away down the hall.
Hoyt’s new killer buddies take him to a shack in the woods where they’ve got Jessica chained up in silver. They want him to kill her and he’s having a hard time with it. They lock him in the room with his former vampire girlfriend, telling him he can’t come out until the deed is done.
Sookie, Jason and the fairies go back to the bridge to try and identify the vampire who killed their parents. They all hold hands and concentrate on trying to access the energy of Sookie’s dead mother. She sees a figure on the bridge who suddenly attacks her parents but she cannot identify the vampire’s face.
Jessica begs Hoyt to take the silver off but he’s still bitter over their broken relationship. He points the gun at her head and you hear a shot. One of the redneck killers comes in to verify Hoyt’s kill and Jessica steps out from behind the door and snaps his neck. Hoyt saved her after all.
When Lafayette arrives home, Arlene and Holly are waiting for him. They want him to contact the dead Iraqui woman and get her to lift the fire demon curse.
Sookie describes her flashback experience to Jason and Claude, saying that she was seeing things from the vampire’s perspective which blows Claude’s mind – he said she made a connection to the vampire and that’s very concerning. One clue comes from this, Sookie heard the murderer’s name, it’s Warlow.
Tara is serving a drink to a former high school acquaintance who acts very annoying and superior in that “I was queen of high school” way that is oh so endearing. When Tara’s fangs drop down and the woman realizes she ‘s a vampire, she exclaims “wow, now you’re a member of two minorities”. Really? How can people be so stupid? But this idiot woman doesn’t stop there, she calls Tara uppity. It’s about to get violent but Pam stops it – sending the stupid woman away.
Eric and Nora have a confrontation over Lilith. He tells her he saw Godric when she saw Lilith. Nora is unyielding in her belief in Salome and Lilith, telling Eric that he will be shown the way. Nothing scarier than a religious fanatic – except for a fanatically religious vampire.
Pam tells Tara that they need to talk. She takes her down to the basement where the blond from high school is tied up, ready for the taking. Pam says it’s her little gift, Tara is owed this after having to listen to this jerk say such crap earlier. And Tara starts to feed.
The werewolves are chasing a human through the woods, planning to kill him for the fun of it. This is JD’s idea of leadership. High on vampire blood, JD kicks the crap of Alcide and is about to kill him when Martha stops him. The pack runs off to hunt their human.
Arlene tricks Terry into coming home, saying there’s a fire, and he frantically barges in looking for the Ifrit. She tells him to sit down, Holly and Lafayette are here to break the curse. Lafayette puts on quite a show, faking it to earn the $300 he charged Arlene to be her medium. When the real Iraqui spirit breaks through, Lafayette is shocked. He says she’s pissed but she’ll lift the curse if Terry kills Patrick. Patrick runs out of the room – some hero.
Sookie sees something manifesting in her bathroom and it’s Warlow, breaking into her dimension. He tells her “I’m coming for you, YOU ARE MINE”. And then he disappears. She is terrified.
The new vampire council is discussing ways to take out the mainstreamers. Russell and Steve happily flirt at the end of the table, irritating Salome who asks them to pay attention. Perhaps Russell has found the replacement for his true love, Talbot?
When Bill offers up a unique idea to get rid of mainstreamers – take out the True Blood factories, there are only five of them – Eric looks at him, asking “what are you doing?” To which Bill replies, “evolving”. Yeah, evolving into the world’s biggest jerk. I wonder when he is going to tell them about Sookie and her special blood. Any day now, I suspect.
True Blood, Season 5, Ep 6: Hopeless
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A wolf drags Alcide down the hall while another attacks Eric, leaving Sookie alone. Just the moment for Russell, who was playing possum by acting weak in the bed, to zip into Sookie’s face with vampire speed and say one of his little quips “you’re just what the doctor ordered”. He’s about to chomp down when she gives him a light blast, sending him into a wall.
Eric races up, ready to stake the former vampire king but Bill holds him back from doing the deed – he says they’ll be killed immediately if they end Russell, it’s best to take him in to the Vampire Authority themselves. How do you kill this guy? I can now see how he’s been alive for centuries. And that’s when the Vampire Authority’s SWAT team steps in with laser sights and black berets to take Russell to meet his fate.
Russell is hauled off in cuffs, muttering threats and blaspheming their god, Lilith. He’s making no friends here. The SWAT leader wants to know why a wolf and a human are there (Alcide and Sookie). Bill says they found them in a van to which Eric adds “humping each other like livestock”. Nice, Eric, nice…
The commando team leader wants to kill Alcide and Sookie on the spot but Bill says let us glamour them. Bill’s glamour says Sookie won’t remember either Bill or Eric, that she will live in the sun as she was meant to be. Eric glamours Alcide to forget the evening but he adds a little extra – you will keep your hands off Sookie, romantically speaking that is…in fact, Eric adds, Sookie disgusts Alcide. Again, nice, Eric, nice…he’s showing his true colors here.
Alcide and Sookie are driving away from the asylum with Sookie hopelessly crying. It does not appear that she was really glamoured by Bill. He simply told her his true feelings. Later, Alcide wakes up in Sookie’s oh-so-girly pink bedroom. Coming downstairs, they start talking and Alcide keeps having flashbacks of their makeout session. She reaches for his hand and he recoils from her. She curses Eric, knowing that he purposely glamoured Alcide into not touching her.
Sam and Luna are in the hospital, having not been killed by the supernatural stalkers when Marcus’ mother brings Emma by to see her mom. Luna and Martha come to a truce and Martha agrees to protect her granddaughter.
Eric and Bill arrive at the Vampire Authority where they are hailed by the councilors as the victors that they are. Salome says she is interrogating Russell but has learned nothing. The Guardian comes in with a bottle of 18th century hemophiliac blood – to vampires it’s like the finest of wines. He’s in a great mood, happy and celebratory but he says he want to execute Russell immediately.
Sookie and Jason go back out to the field to find the fairy nightclub. Sookie simply walks into it but Jason can’t go in until she reaches back out and brings him in. Once again, we’re subject to the dance party of scantily clad fairies gyrating all over the place.
Andy drops by the redneck store where Sookie bought the liquid silver a few episodes ago and challenges the proprietor on his wooden bullet sales. Sam saunters in and starts looking at bows when he suddenly yells “Andy!” because the store owner, Junior, has ducked beneath the counter and come back up with a gun aiming to shoot them both. But, Sam gets him first with an arrow to the chest. No loss there…
Hoyt is being drained dry by some random dude vampire in the alley behind Fangtasia. The vampire actually stops drinking for a minute and says that Hoyt’s heart is slowing; perhaps they should call it quits. Hoyt’s says no and so the guy keeps going. Suddenly a van pulls up and yells “Die Fanger” and they shoot the vampire sucking on Hoyt’s neck. The shooter runs up and recognizes the weak, collapsing Hoyt and he carries him away.
Back at the fairy club, Claudine’s fairy brother tells Sookie and Jason that a vampire ambushed her parents because it smelled Sookie’s blood in the car due to an old band aid that was lying in the backseat. She backs away from him, denying it and shaking her head. She attempt a hand blast of light energy but it fizzles out and this causes all the other fairies to aim their light beams which converge on her.
Nora is still praying in her cell as Eric stands there watching her. Eric turns to see them drag Russell by on his way to execution. She says their plan is coming to fruition. Eric suddenly realizes that it’s not Nora who released Russell, it’s Salome.
As the Guardian is about to kill Russell, he starts screaming, “it’s all about order, not chaos” and he presses the button to drive the stake into Russell’s heart. Only, it does nothing and Russell attacks the Guardian, staking him instead. Russell ends this episode with another famous Russell-esqe line…peace is for pussies. How droll. Since he survived this latest execution attempt, I suspect we are in for quite a few more of these witticisms. Can’t wait…
